Dead Fish in a Box

The chronicles of a suburban fishpimp trying to keep it rural.

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Location: United States

Monday, May 26, 2008

Oh Great, Now The House is Gonna Be Haunted!

We were planting our new witch hazel tree when we unearthed the latest in a string of odd back-yard finds: a dead pet hermit crab in a Lighthouse Blue Cheese Salad Dressing jar. We'll put it up there with the E.T. toothbrush, and the rusted-out safe deposit box.

Who knows what's next!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I don't know what it is about my buddy Ed. There's something about him that makes people say really goofy things. A few years ago I wrote about the time he ordered a vanilla latte in Manhattan and was told by the barista that he could make Ed a regular latte and add vanilla syrup, but that they did not have vanilla lattes.

The latest in this long-running trend happened last week. His birthday was last Monday (5/5) and as he was packing to meet be for a birthday margarita a coworker (who I'm sure is plenty intelligent) asked "Today's you birthday? Is it always on Cinco de Mayo?"

For those of you who no habla Espanol, "Cinco de Mayo" is Spanish for the 5th of May.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Reno Part II

Mrs. Fishpimp hates Reno and Las Vegas. She grew up just over the state line in California. She's got stories upon stories about how all her trips into Nevada have gone awry. My trip to The Biggest Little City in the World certainly could have fit into this trend. In three days I:

  • Suffered the worst turbulence I have ever experienced coming into Reno.
  • Left my I-Pod and Sales Manager Class homework on the air plane.
  • Dropped my perscription sunglasses on the floor where a cocktail waitress stepped on and crushed them
  • Beat my boss's 3 Aces with a 8's over Aces full house, then lost it all back to him leaving me with no money and an upset manager.
  • Had to re-learn that just because the booze is free doesn't mean I have to drink it.
  • Had to relearn that I don't like Blackjack.
  • Had to apologize to the waitress who broke my glasses for my boss's bungled humor that cost us at least three rounds of free drinks (She was from Albania, not Alabama - slight difference)
Despite all that I ended up having a great time. I got new glasses that actually fit my head (Punky - no more Ray Charles jokes!), found my book and I-Pod back in Seattle, and ended up having a great chat with my boss in the Airport before our flight home (along with 3 free Bloody Marys!). I was determined to have a good trip, and I did.

The power of positive thinking is real, even in Nevada.